It was not a triumphal return. Home, as I had known it, was gone.
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Home is so far from home.
I didn’t feel at home in life.
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I have lost all sense of home, having moved about so much. It means to me now — only that place where the books are kept.
Home is run no more.
Out of my ignorance, I called you a homeland and I forgot homelands are taken away.
You can't go home again. Your childhood is lost. The friends of your youth are gone. Your present is slipping away from you. Nothing is ever the same.
One must leave home if he is to find home
Softer memories once lived there.
Where there is now burning.
Where there is now blood.
That was where childhood held you.
Instead there is a forgetting.
Instead there is a fireflood.
You have never forgotten how home was more
than just a language you grew inside your mouth
before you said it in a way your tongue bled.
When it lived as a place
outside of your body and more
than just in your heart and head.
Where you once taught your children
how to speak and walk and sang them
lullabies till they fell asleep in their beds.
How it has become a legend,
just a holy story you pass from
praying hands to praying hands.
Where once you built hallowed walls
there is now simply scorched earth
and bloodied sands.
A memory of the scared land
that it once was before your whole world
was set completely to flames
How your heart breaks everyday
because home, home no longer remembers
how to say your name.
Home was your refuge, and I wish they would see.
because after cruelly taking it from you,
they call you refugee.
I am away from home and must always write home, even if any home of mine has long since floated away into eternity.
My home drove me
into the wilderness.
Few look for me. Few hear me.
I had grown accustomed to my station here.
Enduring it as if lost in a dream.
But today, my eyes have been opened.
Today, I awake.
Too long have I suffered adversity.
Pain from the actions of those entrusted with protecting me.
Forging on, my past shall not define me, even as I stand afeard a resurgence of my true vulnerabilities.
The time has come at last to abandon this isle.
To depart, never to return.
Fare thee well, O home.
Wait for my return no longer.
Onward I must proceed with strength in each footfall
Evermore haunted with the memories of the man I used to be.
For my old home is now behind me.
Faith is my new home.
You can’t go home again because home has ceased to exist except in the mothballs of memory.
His spirit changed house, and vanished there, Where I have not been, so cannot say where.
Home is neither here nor there. Home is within you, or home is nowhere at all.
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