The first half of life is learning to be an adult-the second half is learning to be a child.

You can spend the entire second half of your life recovering from the mistakes of the first half.

Half of life is fucking up, the other half is dealing with it.

Life is a cruel teacher. It punishes you first, and then gives you the lesson.

Life is a school where every pupil must learn a different lesson.

It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.

Life was clearly a cruel joke. A place with no guarantees, built on a foundation of false assumptions if not outright untruths. You think everything’s going okay… Then they shoot your fucking dog.

Half the skill of being educated is learning what you can ignore.

In all the works on pedagogy that ever I read — and they have been many, big, and heavy — I don't remember that any one has advocated a system of teaching by practical jokes, mostly cruel. That, however, describes the method of our great teacher, Experience.

Traditionally, life has been divided into two main parts: a period of learning followed by a period of working. Very soon this traditional model will become utterly obsolete, and the only way for humans to stay in the game will be to keep learning throughout their lives, and to reinvent themselves repeatedly. Many if not most humans may be unable to do so.

I liked being half-educated; you were so much more surprised at everything when you were ignorant.

The first thing you learn in life is you're a fool. The last thing you learn in life is you're the same fool.

It takes half your life before you discover life is a do-it-yourself project.

To teach is to learn twice.