Still never had any friends because I hate everyone for they were so phony.

I told my psychiatrist, “Doc, I keep thinking I’m a dog.” He told me to get off his couch.

I hate Dr Phil. Dr Phil told me to express my feelings, so I'm expressing them.

Why do they call me misanthrope? Because They hate me, not I them.

"What would you think of an engineer who expounded the art of flying without revealing the secrets of the engine and propeller? That's what you do, you engineer of the human soul. Just that. You're a coward. You want the raisins out of my cake but you don't want the thorns of my roses. Haven't you too, little psychiatrist, been cracking silly jokes about me? Haven't you ridiculed me as "the prophet of bigger and better orgasms"? Have you never heard the whimpering of a young wife whose body has been desecrated by an impotent husband? Or the anguished cry of an adolescent bursting with unfulfilled love? Does your security still mean more to you than your patient? How long will you go on valuing your respectability above your medical mission? How long will you refuse to see that your pussyfooting procrastination is costing millions their lives?"

I don't hate you 'cause I'm crazy... I'm crazy 'cause I hate you.

I'm controversial. My friends either dislike me or hate me

I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients.

"Nobody likes me!"
"I wish I could like you, Charlie Brown, but I can't... If I were to like you, it would be admitting that I was lowering my standards! You wouldn't want me to do that, would you? Be reasonable! I have standards that I have set up for liking people, and you just don't meet those standards! It wouldn't be reasonable for me to like you!"
"I hate myself for being so unreasonable!"

Take it easy, Norman. When the psychiatrist goes crazy, it's a bad sign.

they said you were mentally healthy, but your madness is the worst

It's part of the shape of the Universe. I only have to talk to somebody and they begin to hate me.

"Do you absolutely despise me, Walter?"
"No." He hesitated and his voice was strange. "I despise myself."

If you are not a psychiatrist, stay away from idiots. They are too stupid to pay a layman for his company.