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View Plans“ ”Don't worry about the past and don't try to figure out the future
Garrison Keillor (born 7 August 1942) is an American novelist, humorist, comedian, and public radio personality.
Biography information from Wikiquote
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View PlansNapoleon said, “The main use of religion is to keep the common people from murdering the rich.
Intelligence is like four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.
Three people were going to the guillotine. The first was a lawyer, who was led to the platform, blindfolded, and had his head put on the block. The executioner pulled the lanyard, but nothing happened. To avoid a messy lawsuit, the authorities allowed the lawyer to go free. The next man to the guillotine was a priest. They put his head on the block and pulled the lanyard, but nothing happened. The blade didn’t come down. They thought it must have been divine intervention, so they let the priest go. The third man to the guillotine was an engineer. He waived his right to a blindfold, so they led him to the guillotine and put his head on the block. As he lay there, he said, “Hey, wait. I think I see your problem.