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The research shows that the embrace of traditional masculinity increases the possibility of domestic violence and abuse committed by a man. If you’re told all your life to “man up,” and you’re not taught any of the other things a man ought to do, then is it any wonder that you’d grow up thinking that a fist is the solution to everything? If you’re told that your physical dominance over a woman is what makes you a man, how else would you act?

My sense of humor developed because it helped me compensate for my pain. If I felt insignificant inside, which I did during my childhood, I learned if I can make someone laugh, it feels like they value me. And if they value me, then it means I’m significant. And if I’m significant because I just made them laugh, then I don’t feel the sense of insignificance that I’m relentlessly trying to escape from. I became addicted to making people laugh. It was my survival strategy. The good thing about that was it helped train me to become a black belt of comedy.